


Memory of a First Kiss

by RookieSand



Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Alternate Universe, F/F, First Kiss, Fluffy, Meeting Again
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-22
Updated: 2020-06-22
Packaged: 2021-03-03 23:01:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,302
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24853507
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RookieSand/pseuds/RookieSand
Summary: After a chance encounter bumping into Marianne at the market, Hilda recalls the last time she'd actually seen Marianne.
Relationships: Marianne von Edmund/Hilda Valentine Goneril
Kudos: 43





	Memory of a First Kiss

**Author's Note:**

> so if this feels like there should be more on other sides that's because at one point there was.  
> but I scrapped this story altogether because I could never get it to a point I liked and I couldn't get a good ending.  
> that being said I still do really like some of it and thought I'd at least edit it to make some sort of sense together. it ends not too bad but a bit abrupt but that's about where I stopped liking it so apologies in advance.  
> anyway, I hope you enjoy nonetheless!

Hilda slipped down an alleyway behind the freshly set up stalls. It had been a while since she'd been to the market alone and she had forgotten how lively it could be. With the weather having just turned the corner, she had wanted to go out on a short trip by herself for a little bit of fresh air after being trapped exclusively in her home for the better part of winter. Of course, that was frowned upon by her father and older brother. So, Hilda had tucked her hair up into a hat and donned a pair of slacks and a waistcoat to make her journey. The color of her hair was a dead giveaway of her lineage. Only the Gonerils had hair like that in this area. She preferred if the townspeople would keep quiet of her whereabouts as she knew, by this point, her brother would be out looking for her.

She continued down the alley a few more feet before she heard, "Hilda!" from down at the other end. She took off running without a second thought. The voice was her brother's and she didn't even need to check behind her to know that he was furious.

Hilda ripped up the street barely dodging out of the way of a car barreling toward her. The driver shouted curses at her but she barely heeded their advice as she continued to weave through stands in the market. She shoved her way through a crowd of people, made a left, and quickly found another alley to drop down. She was slightly out of breath but didn't have the luxury of stopping. She kept her pace as she went to round the corner back onto the street.

She slammed hard into another person, not paying attention to where she was going. The other person let out a startled yelp and both of them were knocked to the ground. Fresh vegetables rolled past Hilda, but she was more concerned about finding her hat that had fallen off. She found it quickly and situated it onto her head once again. Hilda finally glanced at the person she had run into.

It was a woman and probably one of the most beautiful women Hilda had ever seen in her life. She looked around Hilda's age with her pale, blue hair tied loosely in a braided bun. Her clothes were plain and her face looked tired and stressed; Hilda couldn't take her eyes off of her. She felt like she recognized this woman.

***

Marianne was staring at the person who had rudely run into her as they were walking swiftly down the alley. It was, of course, Hilda Goneril. There was no mistaking that pink hair however briefly Marianne saw it. Hilda had already gathered her hair up and sat her cap back onto her head. She stared back at Marianne, her head cocked to the side. Marianne, on the other hand, was near tears. Her groceries were everywhere. She didn't have the money to replace any of them so she'd have to pick them up and salvage what she could. What a horrible day this was turning into. She finally picked herself up and began collecting her things.

Hilda watched her and didn't show any signs of stopping to help or apologizing. Did she think this was funny? That a person poorer than she had to pick up their food from the street. Marianne held her tears back, her dismay starting to turn to frustration and anger. Hilda didn't deserve to see them.

"My apologies, ma'am," Hilda finally said. She was trying to pitch her voice lower as if that was going to help hide who she was. She shook her head as if to clear it and then began helping to pick up the groceries. "I didn't see you."

"Perhaps you shouldn't be running around the market like a child," Marianne said sharply. She'd spoken quietly enough that she knew Hilda would hear her if she was bothering to listen but not loud enough to force Hilda to hear her. She picked up the last of the vegetables and straightened up.

"You are correct about that." Hilda straightened was well and faced Marianne with an odd sort of smile. "This might sound a bit weird, but do I know you?"

Marianne tilted her head to the side. She supposed it had been years since they'd last seen each other. It wasn't that weird that Hilda didn't remember who she was. To be honest, she wasn't sure she would've recognized Hilda immediately either if she hadn't seen the pink hair.

"Marianne Edmund," Marianne said softly. "You're Hilda Goneril."

Hilda tapped her foot thoughtfully. "Edmund... Edmund..." She brought her fist down into her other hand as the answer came to her. "Of course. Edmund! The shepherd family. Ms. Edmund, have you gotten taller?" Hilda waggled her eyebrows and said it in the tone that implied it was some sort of saucy secret.

Marianne wasn't sure how to respond. She wasn't exactly friends with Hilda or anything. And regardless of her personal feelings for Hilda, their families weren't on speaking terms. If either of their fathers found out about there chance meeting, there would be hell to pay. Marianne had a headache just thinking about it.

"I-I don't believe so," she said finally.

Hilda's gaze shifted to behind Marianne and her smile disappeared. "Rats, it's Holst. Time's up. Well, Ms. Edmund, I must be going." Hilda's eyes rested on Marianne's once again. She fished in her pocket and produced a small bag. "Please take this and replace anything you must. But I do hope that we can meet again soon." She pressed the bag into Marianne's hand and then took off in a quick skip towards the exit of the market.

Marianne frowned. She opened up the bag and immediately closed it again, recoiling at what she found in there. She had only peeked but she was certain there was more than enough money in the bag to cover three weeks' worth of groceries. She couldn't spend this. If she spent it, there could be interest attached to the missing money. At the same time, most of her things were ruined. She could go without eating much for the week, but her father would more than likely find out she was starving herself for his sake. She bit her lip. She would only spend what she needed to replace everything. Nothing more.

***

Hilda was almost out of the market when she was pulled to a sudden stop by a strong hand grabbing her wrist. She yelped as a brief pain shot through her arm. She twisted around and looked up into the face of her brother. He looked very angry, not that Hilda could blame him. He'd probably been chasing her down all morning. 

"Get. In. The. Car," he ground out. Hilda knew she was royally fucked. Holst was rarely ever so intense with her. "You're lucky that Father is out today. Otherwise, you would be in much more trouble."

Hilda nodded and followed Holst to where their car was parked. He helped her into the backseat and then climbed in himself. The driver pulled out of the market and headed back toward their home. It was uncomfortably quiet in the car and Hilda sunk low into the seat.

"What were you thinking going out like that?" Holst asked. He'd lost most of the edge in his voice, sounding more defeated than anything else.

Hilda folded her arms and turned away from Holst. "I'm an adult. I can make my own decisions. If I choose to go out, then I can go out."

"You may see it that way, but what if anything had happened to you? You could get hurt, stolen, or even lost. There have been rumors of things happening to young women around the market recently."

Hilda rolled her eyes. She'd heard the rumors of what happens to young women at the market more times than she could remember. Her father and brother were always telling her how scary it was to go out there. So far, she'd yet to run into any trouble.

"I saw a woman my age at the market today," she said leaning on his arm overdramatically. "Should I have warned her of the dangers too?"

Holst didn't like that answer but said nothing in return. He gently pushed her off of his arm and turned to look out of his window. At least Hilda had weaseled her way out of a long lecture. She wasn't particularly in the mood to hear about it, especially since she'd given away her allowance without a second thought. She was in a hurry and had handed the whole bag over. She figured now would be a terrible time to tell Holst about that.

Hilda stared out the window of her room. A thunderstorm had just started and was pelting her window with rain. She sighed as she watched the field outside her house begin to flood. Did it have to be so miserable outside?

She was still thinking about seeing Marianne in the market. It had been a while since she'd seen Marianne but that wasn't uncommon. Hilda was hardly permitted to leave the grounds so there were plenty of people she didn't know or hadn't seen in a long time. She was fairly certain the last time she'd seen Marianne had been at a merchant meeting years back. 

They had both had their sixteenth birthdays at the time. Marianne was accompanying her father, who was coughing occasionally into a rag. Marianne was tending to him with a concerned look on her face, but it wasn't any of Hilda's business. For as long as she could remember, they'd always been like that. It was more a fact of life than something she cared to concern herself with.

The adults excused themselves into the meeting room. Marianne was shoved aside by her father roughly as he went to make his way into the chamber. Hilda knew that Marianne's father didn't treat Marianne the same way that her father treated her. That was also something Hilda came to accept as fact. And it certainly didn't concern her. 

Marianne sat dutifully outside the door in a chair that the servants had provided her. She was reading a book and didn't appear to be interested in wandering around the castle. Hilda kept an eye on her but only because she thought Marianne was cute. She hadn't said so to anyone, but she had always fancied Marianne. She liked the way Marianne's slender fingers held the book. She liked the way her eyes studiously flicked across the page, reading faster than Hilda could ever dream of. She liked the curve of Marianne's jaw and thought about how much she'd love to run her fingers along it as her lips met Marianne's in a gentle—

"You're staring, Ms. Goneril."

Marianne's voice cut through Hilda's thoughts and made her jump. Her face felt hot, slightly embarrassed at being caught. She came fully around the corner from where she had been peeking out. She folded her hands behind her back and approached Marianne with a coy grin, smoothing her ruffled feathers quickly.

"What are you reading, Ms. Edmund?"

Marianne's eyes flicked up to look at Hilda for just a second. "It's a book on sheep husbandry, though I am sure you're not very interested in that."

"Well, I could be," Hilda said offhandedly, rocking on her heels. "If my partner was a shepherd."

She tried not to wince visibly as she thought about the repercussions of what she'd just said. She thought it would be fun to flirt with Marianne, but she hadn't considered how much it made her chest feel funny. Now her palms were sweaty too. Uncomfortable.

"Hm, well, that would be unfortunate."

"Why's that?"

"You'd have to move away and we couldn't see each other anymore," Marianne said softly. "My father is the only shepherd in this area as far as I know."

Hilda couldn't believe how stupid Marianne was for someone so smart. Still, that was incredibly sweet of her to say. Hilda's heart was close to bursting and she wished that things could've been different for them, just for a moment. Still, she wasn't quite done with her fun.

"Have you had your first kiss, Ms. Edmund?"

Marianne looked up from her book, her eyes wide and startled. "Wh-What makes you ask that?"

"Nothing in particular. I was curious. Girl talk and all that."

Marianne looked away again, her cheeks bright red. "I haven't."

"Would you like to?" Marianne's head snapped up and Hilda added quickly, "Well, you wouldn't want your first one to be bad, right? We could practice!"

"Well, I..." Marianne said uncertainly. She looked up and down the hall. "I shouldn't leave the door."

"That's alright," Hilda said. She extended her hand and pulled Marianne up to her feet. "It'll be a short practice. We can do it right here."

Hilda looked up at Marianne with bright eyes. She hadn't realized how tall Marianne actually was. She'd never been so close to her before. She guided Marianne's hands to her waist and then looped her arms around Marianne's neck. Marianne already had her eyes squeezed shut and her lips puckered. Hilda felt her heart swell. Marianne was just too adorable for words.

Hilda pressed her lips against Marianne's. Hilda would never ever admit that this was also her first kiss. It was a little bit surprising for her. She hadn't expected Marianne's lips to be so wet and squishy. She brought her hand down and ran her thumb along Marianne's jaw just like she'd been imagining. Her heart thumped. She wondered if Marianne could feel it with their chests pressed tight together like they were. 

They sprung apart shortly after that, Hilda unwilling to press things too far. Despite acting so confidently about it, she was a bundle of nerves and her hands were practically shaking. Neither of them spoke a word about it and Marianne went back to reading as if nothing had happened.

Hilda's lips had burned for the rest of the evening and she had made sure to watch Marianne as she left. That, of course, had been one of the last times she'd seen Marianne. A deal between their fathers had gone south and thus ended with their families hating each other.

Still, Hilda savored that kiss. She'd never kissed anyone else like that since then. She'd had other kisses but they'd never kickstarted her heart like that. Even seeing Marianne in the market had made her heart sing in a way she hadn't felt since then. She sighed heavily and shook her head. In love with a woman? Her father would kill her.

Holst entered her room only knocking briefly. "Hilda, Father said I am to confiscate your allowance."

Hilda looked away from the window and regarded Holst with a dead-eyed gaze. "About that..."

He crossed his arms and his face was already pulling into a disapproving frown. "What did you do?"

"I lost it earlier in the market." She decided blunt honesty was the better course of action here. 

"You what?!"

"I accidentally bumped into someone and it must've fallen out of my pocket when we collided."

"Hilda..." Holst sighed and rubbed his forehead. "Well, I'm sure they picked it up without a second thought. Do you remember what they looked like?"

Hilda shook her head. "Sorry, no."

"Fine. I'll cover for you but you won't have your allowance for at least two weeks as I'm supposed to be giving you back this week's as next week's."

"That's fine..." Hilda said waving her hand. "I don't really care." _It's not like I can go anywhere to spend it_ , she thought bitterly. Out loud she said, "Holst, can I ask you a question?"

"What?"

"Do you remember Marianne Edmund?"

"That little, shy girl that used to be her father's shadow when he'd attend merchant meetings? Of course. What about her?"

Hilda shrugged. "I just remembered her today... I don't remember why her father stopped coming to merchant meetings."

Holst grunted. "Well, you needn't dwell on it as it doesn't concern you. And you would do well to not get involved and go looking for trouble, Hilda. I don't know what you're thinking, but Father wouldn't be very pleased if you started to talk to that family."

What a curious answer that was.

"I won't. I was just curious," Hilda mumbled.

***

Marianne woke just as the sun was beginning to rise. She made breakfast, fed the dogs, helped her father sit on the back porch, and opened up the barn. She only used one dog to herd the flock down into the pasture and then returned to the house. She washed the laundry and hung it out to dry. Next on the list was tending to her small garden, then dusting the house, and lastly cleaning the chicken coop.

With her chores done, she leashed up the dogs and headed down the road with them. There was a field not too far that she liked to run the dogs in when they wouldn't be working. As far as she knew, the property wasn't owned by anyone. It was a lush field of grass and wildflowers. The dogs started to perk up as soon as they knew where they were headed. She reached the field and unleashed them.

They sprinted out into the field at top speed, weaving about and bumping into each other. The breeze made the grass wave like a green ocean. Marianne lost sight of them, but she wasn't too concerned. They'd come back with a sharp recall whistle. She found the shade of a nearby tree at the top of a small hill that overlooked the field. Black and white dots would occasionally pop their heads out from the sea. She kept a count. One. Two. Three. One. Two. Three. One. Two... Three. She leaned against the tree. 

After the rain, it was very muggy. She was sweating in her thick skirt and sweater. The sun wasn't helping any either. She shrugged her jacket off and hung it up over a low branch on the tree.

"What are you doing here?"

Marianne nearly jumped out of her skin. Her heart stopped as she spun around to face Hilda Goneril who was peeking around the tree.

"Wh-Wh-I... I don't..." Marianne stammered in utter confusion.

Hilda laughed at Marianne's apparent discomfort and circled around the tree to stand in front of her. Marianne pressed her back against the tree, the bark digging into her. She wasn't sure where Hilda had come from. The Gonerils didn't live anywhere near this area. She at least didn't appear to be with her father or brother so that was a relief.

"You don't what?" Hilda asked casually. She looked Marianne up and down. "You know you could pretend to be happy to see me, Ms. Edmund."

Marianne frowned. "Now... Wh-Why would I do th-that?" She silently cursed herself for her voice being so shaky. Hilda was going to walk all over her if she didn't pull herself together quickly.

Hilda smirked. "Well, I don't know, Ms. Edmund... I thought your first kiss would mean a bit more to you than that." She tilted her head slightly and batted her eyes.

Marianne nearly choked. She'd completely forgotten about that. It wasn't like she had the free time to dwell on it. Besides, as far as she was concerned they were young then. It was just Hilda getting what he wanted like she always did. Although, Marianne couldn't help the thumping that had started up in her chest.

"We... We aren't going to talk about that," Marianne said quietly. She was staring firmly at the ground.

"Well, why not?"

"Because you're-you're—"

"I'm what? A Goneril?"

Marianne looked up at Hilda now. Hilda had taken a step away from her. She had her hands clasped behind her back and a somewhat sad smile on her face.

"Ms. Goneril, that wasn't..."

Hilda shook her head slowly. "Well, my father and brother do keep me in the dark about most things," she said softly as she turned to face the field. "They'd prefer I was a pretty face for them more than anything so I don't have much a hand in any business they do. Eventually, I'll just be another pawn for them to marry a rich man into the house. I know that." She sighed heavily.

"Ms. Goneril, I'm sorry, but I don't—"

Hilda spun around and was in Marianne's space in an instant. She pressed a finger to Marianne's lips and gave her a coy smile. "Shh, Ms. Edmund... You don't need to feel sorry for me. I know we're not on speaking terms. I'm sure you're more aware of the situation than I am. Please, hear me out, though."

Marianne sighed and nodded for Hilda to continue.

Hilda pulled away again. "Seeing you once again in the market stirred up that memory of our kiss. I had nearly forgotten how fond I was of you back when we used to see each other so often. I want to start seeing you again. I'll make it worth your while..."

"And what does seeing you entail?"

Hilda blinked in surprise and for a second Marianne thought she had uprooted her for once. But Hilda's face quickly regained its calm, neutral smile and she laughed.

"Oh, well, it can be nothing, Ms. Edmund..." She rubbed the back of her neck. "Well, I... Well, I suppose I am looking to kiss you more if that would be alright with you. We certainly don't have to but I won't beat around the bush that that is what I'm looking for. I'll make all the arrangements and tell you where and when. I'll pay you if you'd like. Name your price!" She took a step toward Marianne.

Marianne blinked in surprise. She wasn't sure what to say. She'd spent the last several years hating the Gonerils and now the daughter wanted back into her life. And for what reason? Hilda looked genuine but Marianne wasn't sure. Even with all of that, she couldn't deny that her hands were clammy and her chest hurt. She wanted it too even if she couldn't admit it out loud. And maybe she wanted to get away from her father or to disobey him in some respect. She couldn't deny that either.

"You don't have to say yes today," Hilda added once the silence stretched out. "I'll send for you by letter. If you don't show up to the location I have chosen, I will assume that you're not interested in my offer."

"Ms. Goneril..."

"Well, I'm glad that I could have this chat with you. Please consider my offer." Hilda nodded once and started back toward the road without another word.

Marianne couldn't respond. She was still too shocked to think straight. She whistled for the dogs and all three came running through the grass. She leashed them and started back towards her home. She had a lot to think about.

It was about a week before Marianne heard anything from Hilda. A letter had been dropped in her mailbox. Not delivered by the mail but dropped off by hand. Marianne was happy that her father never checked the mail. The letter smelled of perfume and had Marianne's name written in beautiful script, with roses drawn around it. She shuffled into her room and opened the letter with careful haste, not wanting to tear any part of it.

_My dearest Marianne,_

_I hope this letter finds you and your father in good health. Though it has been but a week since I last laid my eyes on you, I cannot think of anything I would rather do than be by your side once again. I will restrain myself from detailing in this letter what I wish to do with you._

_There are no words to describe how beautiful you are. Seeing you makes my chest uneasy to the point my heart may give out. Your blue hair is comparable to nothing but the Heavens themselves. Our glorious goddess must look down on you with pride for having created a woman so beautiful. Every rain is for you, as our goddess can only cry laying her eyes upon you._

_In a different place, I hope that you would accept my kindnesses in stride. You could be my world if I offered you my hand, though I suppose you already are._

_I would like you to meet me at the inn this Sunday evening. I am aware of your prior commitments and shall be staying there through the night so please come at your earliest convenience. Staff at the inn will be aware of your late arrival, should it be well into the evening. Ask for me and they will escort you to our room._

_If you are unable to make this meeting, I will make one other arrangement soon to follow. If you do not make that engagement either, then I will cease all contact assuming you do not wish to meet with me._

_Kindest regards,_

_Your Love Hilda Valentine Goneril_

Marianne set the letter down with an almost blank expression. Hilda had been a bit melodramatic but Marianne couldn't stop her heart from pounding at the flowery prose. Despite it being over the top, she knew Hilda had spent time in writing this. The cursive was too neat and tidy. There wasn't a drop of misplaced ink. She had slaved over this letter just to send it to Marianne. 

Marianne flopped back onto her bed, kicking her legs into the air. She supposed she had a date for Sunday then. She couldn't wait.


End file.
